Brokenness is a Beautiful Thing

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Brokenness is a beautiful thing.

Yet it's often in our brokenness that we tend to run, and run far. We see ourselves to be beyond repair, too broken. We see all our hurts, our scars, our failures, our tears. Our heart cries out for something more, yet we turn to everything and everyone but the Healer of hurts to satisfy us, to cover up the pain.

But that is often where Jesus meets us. Oh how thankful I am that He meets us in our brokenness! He doesn't use the strong and mighty, the powerful and able-bodied, to do His work. He finds the imperfect, the prodigals, the brokenhearted--and He forms something beautiful.

That's just who God is. He makes beautiful things out of dust. He breathes his Spirit of perfection into sin-filled hearts. He sees the holy blood of His Son in place of all our imperfections.

And so we lift up our brokenness to Him. It's in this place of hurts and tears that He whispers to us His promises, reminding us of His constant presence. It's in this place of weakness that we breathe in the strength of God, in our place of defeat that we discover His victory.

It's in this place of brokenness that we come face to face with the unending love of God, the love that wraps us in His beautiful grace, the love that leaves the ninety-nine in order to bring just the one wanderer home.

People may fail us, things may fail, we may fail. But this love will never fail us. This love is strong enough to bring the dead back to life. To lift up humble, beaten down hearts to a place of security and healing.

To show Himself through our broken lives, and bring our brokenness to a place of beauty.

Brokenness is a beautiful thing.

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. Psalm 147:3


My Heart's Only Cry

Rid me of impatience,

of fear,

of emptiness.

Replace it with Your healing love.

Let my desires align with Yours, Lord,

and let my only aim be Your glory,

a life lived for You.

May my heart's only cry be for You alone.


More Than A Genie

How amazing is it that God actually gives us Himself? The infinite, glorious, spectacular, and altogether lovely God of the universe is all ours. --Jefferson Bethke

A relationship with God isn’t a relationship at all if we’re only after what God can give us.

We turn to God and expect Him to answer our every need. We call Him faithful and good when He does those very things, and rightly we should. But a relationship with God isn’t about what He can give us, but about loving H
im for who He is—our God, our Savior, our Father. When we stop treating God like He’s a genie in a bottle and start embracing a relationship with Him, we discover a joy that will remain even when everything is taken from us. We learn to still love God and we grow in our relationship with Him because we know that the things of this world, and the trials we face, do not define or shift the character of God. He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He will not leave us or forsake us. His love for us will never end.

What kind of loving relationship exists when two people only care about what they can get from their significant other? It’s shallow. There’s no love for the other person, no care or desire to grow deeper in their relationship. 

So it is with God. Yes, He is our Provider, but that’s just an added bonus to getting to know Him through a deep, daily walk. When we truly get to know Him for who He is, rather than what we can get, we discover a prize that is beyond anything we could ever ask for.


This Single Woman's Aim

An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. 1 Cor. 7:34

Wow. God really pulled at my heart a few days ago as I stumbled upon this verse. As a single woman, I have so much opportunity before me, yet this is a reminder that my ultimate concern should not be about the opportunities offered in this world, but that of the opportunities only found in God and in pursuing His kingdom.

So I switched out the beginning of this verse with the replacement of "single woman," just to continue to shed light on exactly what this verse means for this period of my life as a single:

A [ single woman ] is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit.

With a dating relationship, and ultimately marriage, the focus isn't fully on God, but on the other person as well. But as a single, my focus can and should be entirely on Him!

So, I choose to be single. I choose to view this time as a gift and to not rush into a relationship.

The world says that singleness is a curse, but God says that it is a blessing. It is a short-lived period of life where I can grow closer and closer to my Lord and Savior each day. I can serve Him. I can get to know Him better. I can continue to seek Him about the path He has for my life.

And if the right guy comes along, in step with God's leading, then what a beautiful moment that will be!

But until then, it is my prayer that my only aim would be full devotion to the Lord in both body and spirit.

That He would be my everything.

That He would be enough.

That's this single woman's aim!


There's a Hole in My Heart

There's a hole in my heart, and my heart yearns for it to be filled. I am discontent, weary, impatient. I am desperate for satisfaction, so I turn to every possible source of this world. Success, love, busyness--these things work at first. I feel a sense of purpose, a sense of contentment, but this feeling is only temporary. No matter where I turn or who I meet, I only become more dissatisfied. My contentment diminishes as I seek to fill this hole. My perspective is altered as my focus shifts to what can satisfy this heart of mine, what can fill the void.

I seemingly forget, in the midst of all this, that there is only One who can fill that hole in my heart.

And His name is Jesus.

Every ounce of dissatisfaction is dissolved in the arms of Jesus Christ. His sweet embrace sweeps me away with a love that is so much greater than anything this world could offer. Jesus brings purpose. Jesus brings contentment. All the things and ways of this world will fade, but He will always remain.

I'm learning to rest in that. I'm learning to trust in that. This hole in my heart was not meant to be filled by the temporal. It was meant to be filled by the love of Jesus. We are all meant to walk in communion with God. He wants to be in relationship with me. He wants to be in relationship with you.

My yearning heart can only be satisfied with His perfect love. That love is chasing after me, and it's chasing after you. Stop running!


Don't Lose Faith

Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what He had promised. Romans 4:20-21

Maybe your circumstances do not appear like they will be changing anytime soon.  Maybe you're praying, and waiting, and seeking God about something, and it looks as if nothing will happen. Maybe you're beginning to believe that God won't come through as He has promised, that He won't finish what He has begun---

don't lose faith.
keep praying. keep seeking. keep knocking. keep trusting.

He has the power to "meet all of your needs according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus" (Phil. 4:19--a timely message I happened to hear in a pizza shop today!). He has the power to do the impossible. He has the power to open the door you've been knocking on, as well as to close the doors that need to be shut.

He has the power to do what He has promised: to finish what He has begun.

This is truth I'm hanging onto.

Your prayers ARE being heard.
Don't lose faith!


Be Grateful For The Manna

"I really don't feel like doing this today"

"It's going to be way too stressful to work a part time job and be a full time college student"

"This video training is going to be so boring"

The complaints kept coming. It was the first day of my first job--video training day. Up until that day, I was pretty excited, but in those moments of the car ride there alongside my mother, the words kept slipping out of my mouth. Negativity filled the air. Grumble, grumble, complain, complain. It was as if I lost all gratitude, all excitement.

As if this job was a curse, rather than a blessing.

It's so easy to do that, isn't it? I'm generally pretty positive and seek to avoid complaining, but some days, it happens. Once the words start coming, it's like the domino effect from there. One complaint leads to many more complaints. All appreciation of God's provision is lost.

At first, I stepped into my workplace and forgot the ugly attitude I was wearing in the car ride there.  Once I began watching the videos, it wasn't long before God took hold of my heart and reminded me of how I was acting. In that moment, I could hear His still, small voice whispering: You were acting like the Israelites. Wasn't this job an answer to your prayers? Wasn't this job a provision from me, a provision even beyond what you expected?

In that moment, I was convicted of acting just like the Israelites did, after God rescued them from their enslavement in Egypt and provided food--manna--for them. Yet they began to complain that they were sick and tired of eating manna all the time. He provided, yet they grumbled:

“If only we had meat to eat! We remember the fish we ate in Egypt at no cost—also the cucumbers, melons, leeks, onions and garlic. But now we have lost our appetite; we never see anything but this manna!Numbers 11:4-6

Seems like the Israelites were forgetting the days of misery they experienced in Egypt. They weren't remembering the complaints they spoke when God first rescued them, when they didn't have any food to eat. Yet God provided. They saw through eyes of dissatisfaction, rather than of gratitude.

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I realized that was me too. This job was not only provided by God, but happened in a way that pointed to His amazing power and love. I had been praying for insight about a part time job for many months, yet the offer basically came to me at the end of my 21-day fast at the beginning of this year. And not only did I get the job, but the provision and pace was beyond what I would have ever expected! Dissatisfaction, maybe a little anxiety, crept in and stole the excitement and joy out of my heart.

Where God guides, He provides. He guided me to this job, He provided me with this job, and He's going to strengthen me through this job!

In that moment of conviction, I asked for forgiveness. How silly of me to forget all that the Lord has done and grumble about His provision!

And in fact, the first few days I've experienced so far have been so enjoyable.

It happens. And it will happen again.

Philippians 2:14-15 says to "do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, 'children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.'"

It's easy to view the "manna" in our lives as anything but a blessing.

Look through the lens of gratitude instead. It takes intentionally choosing to look at our situations as provisions from God.  But when we do, we will not only walk in joy, but in the satisfaction of knowing that He is in control, and will lead us through!